A young lawyer wakes up the morning after a work gala with no memory of how she got home the previous night and must figure out what, exactly, happened—and how much she’s willing to put up with to make her way to the top of the corporate ladder.
Jade isn’t even my real name. Jade began as my Starbucks name, because all children of immigrants have a Starbucks name.
Jade has become everything she ever wanted to be.
Successful lawyer.
Dutiful daughter.
Beloved girlfriend.
Loyal friend.
Until Jade wakes up the morning after a work event, naked and alone, with no idea how she got home. Caught between her parents who can’t understand, her boyfriend who feels betrayed, and her job that expects silence, the world Jade has constructed starts to crumble.
Jade thought she was everything she ever wanted to be. But now she feels like nothing at all.
“[…] I’d be asked why I hadn’t reported it to the police in the morning after. Why I hadn’t fought back. Why, if he was so dangerous, did I get into a taxi with him. Why I continued to show up to Reuben every day. It didn’t account for the fact that white women lost to white men in sexual assault cases. They say justice is blind but why did a brown woman’s chances against a white man feel insurmountable? It didn’t account for my unwillingness to retraumatise myself, over and over. Slice myself open and let strangers rummage into me. Be cooperative, likeable and transparent, lay my innards bare. Whilst Josh was cotton-wooled in a system skewed to protect his kind. Admit to strangers what happened to me and watch them decide whether I deserved to be believed. Watch them fight the default assumption that I am lying.”
If you only read one book this year, make sure it’s Jaded by Ela Lee.
This book tore me apart. I knew going in, based on some of themes, that it was likely going to be close to home. Boy, did it really hit me where it hurts. And I say that positively as a sexual assault survivor and mixed race gal.
I’m astonished that this is Lee’s debut. Her writing is so intimate, raw and haunting. From the moment Jade begins to piece together what has happened to witnessing the fallout as she seeks support in those around her, I could feel her pain. Her self-loathing and interactions with people she’s supposed to trust (Kit, Reuben HR etc) echoed so many of my own experiences coming forward. While the exact situation and circumstances were different to my own case, I saw a lot of myself in Jade. Jade’s experience may be frustrating to read but it isn’t just fiction, it’s reality – as I well know – and reading Jaded allowed me to stew in my anger at the system’s failure when it comes to sexual violence and the misogynistic behaviour that society has allowed to grow and fester, especially in the workplace.
Jaded perfectly captures modern feminine rage, with Lee exploring several deep themes. Alongside sexual assault, rape and misogyny, Lee touches upon power and class dynamics, white privilege, cultural identity and toxic work cultures.
While the likes of Josh, Kit and Leo remind of us men we definitely know, there’s never a moment where they feel like caricatures of the toxic men that we’ve all encountered. Lee is a master storyteller. Her sophisticated and emotive writing alongside her expert characterisation enables us to not only resonate with Jade but makes it feel like we’re witnessing the grief and trauma of a close friend. I had an anxious pit in the bottom of my stomach the entire time while reading. You just want to take her aside, give her a hug and say ‘I know.’
A gut-wrenching yet beautifully-written debut, Jaded was the book I didn’t know I needed until now. It’s a very heavy read but if you know, you know. For me, it was cathartic experience and has solidified itself as one of my firm favourites. Dare I say it, the best book I’ve read this year – so far! It was an emotional rollercoaster and much-needed release.
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